Daydreaming for a mirage...

There are days when all you want to do is lounge in the sand, on a sunny beach, the waves breaking at your feet...your head in the clouds, aided by a cocktail in your hand (just kidding)...the ambience is good enough to make you light headed as it is..

So what would you give for a life like that??? Well the answers can range from a flat yes (from me) to a moral lecture on standing on your feet..But there are times in life when more than anything else, all you want is to be pampered an loved..or rather, if I be truthful, just be to rich enough to enjoy everything in life without the worry of tomorrow....to be blessed with a miracle that will take the mad race you are running in and turn it around..all that you are running after comes hurling at you..and you stand with open arms to embrace the miracle..

I guess this is what all people like us, who have to spend day in day out slogging it out in an office, getting work done, fantasize about everyday.. and this fantasy does have an orgasmic feeling to it..

It comes to me that life is unfair to a lot of people; or rather everyone can find a way in which life has been unfair to them..if I count all my blessings and then compare them to the undisputable wrongs that destiny ordained for me.. I have to say that the good outweighs the bad everyday…however; the scale will be set in this case by your own moral compass or even the mood that has currently descended on you, when thinking about the emotion..

You can wallop yourself in self pity or set your heart straight and get back to work…at the end of the day, such fantasizing doesn’t really establish much except for a certain dissatisfaction in your heart and an aching longing for a life that will take a number of years for you to achieve at your own hands.

Well lotteries don’t come to people every day, though I don’t know anyone who will ever say no to one…you have to tell your heart to hold its horses..and do a reality check and say..there is nobody but you who can do anything to change the life you live..however a little magic will be a lot of help!!

How to decide what is right in a relationship...???

How to you plan to keep yourself afloat? In a relationship, how do you define what is right or wrong? When should you put yourself first and your partner second? Who is the right person to trust and who is the right person to ask advice?...and the sooo many questions plaguing you mind.

Not every one of these questions can merit an answer, or an answer that will satisfy you or stand tall on an individual’s moral grounds. So let’s take these questions one at a time.

How do you keep yourself afloat?

I think the key to doing that is making sure that the origin of your happiness is not limited to that one person. This does not mean giving any less importance to your loved one, but it also means not giving up your life to suit the life of your guy or gal. Make sure that there are certain pursuits in the day that are non inclusive to your partner and bring you the feeling of being alive and being a part of something else…It can be doing your dance or pottery class, or taking the time to call your best friend and having that chat that lets you share your feelings and calms you down..Make sure you have an entity of your own that separates you from your partner..And if that loved one is the right person, he will appreciate that personality and that side of you.

In a relationship, how do you define what is right or wrong?

So you just had a fight with you sweetheart, how do you say that every tactic you used in that fight of yours was justified?  If you live by the proverb “everything is fair in love and war” (and this fight technically includes both) then it is a different story. However, if that does not hold true then I have one advice for you..i know this trick works quiet a number of times, but this is fundamentally wrong..when you say you did something, or planned something nice for your partner but it didn’t turn out because they had their own plans.. “Sweetheart I know you’re feeling sick, I had made complete plans of coming and taking care of you, but now your sister is there, what can I do now?”

These sound like extremely viable sentiments, but say this only when you mean it. Your partner might just see through it (even they must have tried this emotional blackmail at times to get to you) and then it can cause a lot more hurt then intended.

If your mind is not too cluttered, you will be able to hear your heart tell you that what you are saying is right or wrong. There are times when your sour mood will get you aggravated over things that don’t mean much in the relationship and you will argue over it. Even though after a while you can feel that the argument is no longer making any sense. Let this fight go. Just take the five steps that will take you close and give your partner a hug. This will put any argument to rest. You just need to have the strength to take the first few steps…give yourself credit of being the person who put that fight to bed.. feel happy and proud that you had the sensibility to let it go.( don’t let it go to your head, and demand similar favors in return).

I’ll put up answers to more questions in the next part of the post…hope you will look forward to it..

...Million faces in the crowd...

Been watching Las Vegas Season 5 these past couple of months, and it seems that the show has finally grown on me. For the Indian audience who saw the episode last night, there was a beautiful piece of melody played on the piano by the guy pursuing Piper. After some background research, it turns out the singer is none other than JC Chasez, a former NSYNC band member. Seems life has not really been fair and he is right now writing song for other singers which he can't sing for himself. Don't know about his singles album but he sure has given one memorable performance in  this one.

The Lyrics:

and even though i lost her
she never looked so beautiful from up here
million faces in a crowd
you will always shine them out
she never looked so beautiful from down here
living illusions darling
i can't face the truth
seeing the dream of you and me
but it's not meant to be
another disaster
my heart has been shattered again
it's two a.m. in the morning
and i'm crying now, crying now
lying in my bed
million faces in a crowd
you were always shining out
she never looked so beautiful from down here

                                           ~Jc Chassez

Chetan Bhagat's take on the stress levels of Indian women

Alright, this is not cool at all. A recent survey by Nielsen has revealed that Indian women are the most stressed out in the world: 87% of our women feel stressed out most of the time. This statistic alone has caused me to stress out. Even in workaholic America, only 53% women feel stressed. 

What are we doing to our women? I'm biased, but Indian women are the most beautiful in the world. As mothers, sisters, daughters, colleagues, wives and girlfriends - we love them. Can you imagine life without the ladies? 

For now, i want to give Indian women five suggestions to reduce their stress levels. 

One, don't ever think you are without power. Give it back to that mother-in-law. Be who you are, not someone she wished you would be. She doesn't like you? That's her problem. 

Two, if you are doing a good job at work and your boss doesn't value you - tell him that, or quit. Talented, hard-working people are much in demand. 

Three, educate yourself, learn skills, network - figure out ways to be economically independent. So next time your husband tells you that you are not a good enough wife, mother or daughter-in-law, you can tell him to take a hike. 

Four, do not ever feel stressed about having a dual responsibility of family and work. It is difficult, but not impossible. The trick is not to expect an A+ in every aspect of your life. You are not taking an exam, and you frankly can't score cent per cent (unless you are in SRCC, of course). It is okay if you don't make four dishes for lunch, one can fill their stomach with one. It is okay if you don't work until midnight and don't get a promotion. Nobody remembers their job designation on their dying day. 

Five, most important, don't get competitive with other women. Someone will make a better scrapbook for her school project than you. Another will lose more weight with a better diet. Your neighbour may make a six-dabba tiffin for her husband, you don't - big deal. Do your best, but don't keep looking out for the report card, and definitely don't expect to top the class. There is no ideal woman in this world, and if you strive to become one, there will be only one thing you will achieve for certain - stress. 

So breathe, chill, relax. Tell yourself you are beautiful, do your best and deserve a peaceful life. Anybody trying to take that away from you is making a mistake, not you. Your purpose of coming to this earth is not to please everyone. Your purpose is to offer what you have to the world, and have a good life in return. The next time this survey comes, i don't want to see Indian women on top of the list. I want them to be the happiest women in the world. Now smile, before your mother-in-law shouts at you for wasting your time reading the newspaper.

Cherish Womanhood.

Wonders on a rainy day

How do you put emotions into words,

It will be some beautiful prose which captures my heart.

The sound of the wind, the rhythm of the rain,

The dance of the trees, those showers of rain.

They touch you, you touch them,

But how does one bear witness to a wonder like that?

How do you stop it in its tracks?

Put it down in words for others to feel?

Oh! I’m lost in wonder, the love that nature dispels,

As you feel sheet after sheet of rain

And the wind in your hair, swept away.

You feel blessed to stare at the wonder,

The beauty of the gods; this kiss of nature.

Listen to the rhythm, listen to the rain,

Listen to every drop that hits your pane,

Close your eyes and feel the wind sweep you away,

You are standing in god's paradise, enjoy this today.

Things to do when the weather is great and you are stuck in office !!

It has rained happily and heavily last night, with thunder showers that have made the next morning apt for an excursion..are you still stuck in office, moaning inside, looking out of the window? Oh I know I am.

·         So the first thing on my checklist is to make a note of this suffering in the form of a new piece for my blog.

·         Next, if you work in a company that lets you be on the phone, taking to clients, then this is your time to make a move. Call up the person you would rather spent the day with and engage in some interesting conversation under the open sky outside, giving you the pleasure of a nice walk in the breeze.

·         If that is not the case, then see if you can arrange a meeting, as far away from your office as possible. You get the option of a long drive in this beautiful weather; and after the meeting, you don’t really have to come back to your boring office.

·         If that is not an option, and your company allows you some “creative time-out”, you should be chalking up the  bill by now.

·         For those with no such options to avail, may be it is time to make a bank visit for an hour or two with some hidden lunch plans up your sleeve.

·         Still no luck?? Didn’t someone miss out on giving a birthday treat this month? Gang up on the poor person right now, and drag the whole group out for a lunch on his expense. Bet you’ll have a great time.

·         Or for that matter, when was the last time, you met your counterpart or client to discuss business? Go out for an official lunch and squeeze in some pleasant time for yourself as well.

·         Now ideas are getting a little tricky.  Are you allowed to have meetings in the open? Pick up your laptop and march out with your team for an official brainstorming session (to discuss last night’s game).

·         Well, there is the obvious thing to do..don’t work, sit, gossip,(and as my friend says) gawk..  ;)

But more than anything else, don’t let anybody mess with your mood..as long as you are determined to enjoy this weather, no grumpy boss, no stupid co-worker can mess with your spirit…so enjoy this weather and make sure no work is done, till you decide to roll up your sleeves and get to it…!!

How a little whiff makes me smile..!!

There is a scent that tells me that you are around, that inspires me to walk ahead and put my mind to work..how a whiff of that particular scent does that might seem beyond reason but I know how it works…every cog in my mind is attuned to the sense of that scent, making equivalent visual imageries and making me smile and my heart strong knowing that it is not alone..

I think the concept behind 3 Idiots was very true...your heart seeks solace in little things, so one should keep it deluded till the time it really needs to roll up its sleeves and get to work…the experiment I did today morning very aptly puts this in perspective.. not wanting to wear my good pair of work slippers when I traversed my one hour journey to office, I put on my house slippers packing the other ones in my bag..walking to the office, there was a certain sense of happiness, the feel of those house slippers took away the heavy feeling I got when I travel every morning, and by the time I actually got to the destination and slipped into my office footwear, it really didn’t matter anymore, coz I knew, now I am here, here to work..

It is these little tiny joys that make it a little easier to stay happy…find for yourself those little joys, that make you walk that extra mile..but make your heart feel,” oh! I didn’t do much!”

This association with sounds, with smells, with touch, really amazes me…how and why, a memory is so strong in my subconscious, imprinted with such strong emotion, that a tiny stimulus can inspire me to do more, go beyond my own impression of myself?

There is a motivation behind every step you take and everything you do…u may be self motivated or may seek motivation from all that is around you..but I know, I will find favor in nature..my own little box of motivations, which will keep in afloat and happy.